u s e y o u r h a n d s

Today, the child planted his own peas and radishes and tucked the edges of the thermal blankets just so. I repotted tomato plants and tried to smell a California spring in this Midwestern chill.

Generally, I look forward to seed-starting season with every fiber of my being. During the long, disgusting Midwest winters (and this one in particular) I claw through each day knowing that at its close, I’m one day closer to spooning Organic Jiffy Mix into plastic cells.

This year has been different. This long winter was harder than most, with profound losses, sadnesses and sicknesses. The seeds can’t come up fast enough for me to climb out of the winter slide.

You can’t win when you measure success in millimeters and failure in miles.

Just got back from a vacation with Gus (and Brian) that seemed both whirlwind and eternal. Three days hauling a toddler around, alone, in a city with no elevators? The prospect seemed daunting. But it was fantastic and now we want to move to Brooklyn.

Day One

- Chat with people on the Q33 bus from LGA to Queens about high-end digital cameras
- Hop on the F Train for a 20-minute subway ride to our hotel in Midtown
- Collapse, exhausted, while Gus whirls around our room at the Omni Berkshire
- We pull it together for a 10-block trek to the Whole Foods at Columbus Circle for some take-out and a week’s supply of hemp milk for Gus
- Elbows fly as we fight through the crowd of pedicab drivers in Central Park in search of a patch of grass
- We head back from the hotel, Brian dresses for cocktail hour, and Gus decides not to sleep
- I have to walk him for an hour, making an ill-considered decision to walk through Times Square in the evening, during a large promotional rally
- Brian comes back and I go to the gym for a run, as I’m training for a 10K

Day Two

- We wake up bright and early (thanks, Gus), get dressed and hit the road. Brian goes down to his conference.
- Gus and I walk south thirty blocks (mostly down Park Avenue) to Madison Square Park, which seems to be a magnet for toddlers, little kids, SAHMs and nannies.
- Gus plays so hard that he craps out before the children’s performers begin playing
- I hit the sidewalk again, toodling through Union Square, where I fill up our water bottles courtesy of a clean fountain and Water NYC volunteers
- I also check out The Strand, and come across a cookbook for Babycakes NYC, a bakery that makes vegan and gluten-free cupcakes
- On my way to this bakery (another twenty blocks or so), I stop at the Bowery Whole Foods for lunch for Gus and myself
- We take an after-lunch spin through Sara Roosevelt Park, where Gus has the tot lot all to himself. He tears it up.
- I see a homeless dude pooping into a subway grate!
- A spin through Chinatown and into NoLiTa delivers us at Babycakes NYC, where I purchase four cupcakes, which instantly begin to melt, and forget my hat and wallet inside. I remember 10 steps out the door.
- I hop on the subway and begin the most uncomfortable subway ride ever, with Gus in my moby wrap intentionally smacking into my face, him trying to get into the cupcakes, and me balancing the stroller
- I collapse back at the hotel while Brian, on afternoon conference break, changes Gus
- After a several-hour respite, Gus and I get ready to hit the road again for the MoMA’s late evening. He screams his way through, like, six flights of art. I’m mortified and over it.
- Since we’re nearby, we go back to the Whole Foods at Columbus Circle for a jumble of Gus food.
- On my way home, I discover that, at least where I am, grocery stores sell beer, but not wine and I NEED WINE.

Day Three

- Gus and I head to our primary destination of the day, The High LIne, in Chelsea. It’s totally incredible, and I find my first and only geocache of the trip.
- We toodle through Chelsea Market, which reminds me of a very small version of the Ferry Building in San Francisco.
- Gus and I have lunch at ’snice in Chelsea. My panini rocked.
- Gus plays for about 45 minutes at Bleecker Playground, where I keep trying to divert his attention from the spray feature since I forgot his swim diaper and shirt.
- We hop on the subway (in between raindrops) and get out in SoHo near City Hall. I’m dying for coffee, and Gus chooses to throw his cup out of the stroller and I can’t find it.
- We take in some cool, neon-colored sculpture at City Hall park on our way to the Brooklyn Bridge
- I’m perfectly blissful during our walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. Good podcasts, sleeping baby, light sprinkles and breeze, fantastic views
- We check in at our hotel just over the bridge, the Brooklyn Marriott
- After a couple hours of rest, during which Brian joins us with our luggage, we’re all ready to head out again
- We take the subway to Greenpoint, Brooklyn for some street-art spotting and beer fresh from Brooklyn Brewery. we also pick up a fantastic kids hat at Area Kids. Dinner comes from WIld Ginger and we eat it in a nearby park under threat of thunderstorm. The rain hits when we get off the subway.

Day Four

- Brooklyn Bridge Park’s tot lot is our destination. Gus has a great time on the toddler equipment while we eavesdrop on the conversations of area parents.
- Bagels (with tofu cream cheese!) and coffee are consumed at Fulton Park, to the east of Brooklyn Bridge Park, near the base of the Manhattan Bridge
- Instead of heading straight back to the hotel, we weave through the rest of DUMBO and Brooklyn Heights.
- As it’s going to be 1000 degrees today, we decide to spend a few hours inside.
- Park Slope is our next destination. On the ride there, our subway car goes elevated and we get aerial views of Brooklyn
- We really love Park Slope. We want to move here. Good coffee, nice people, and great craft beer and food at Bierkraft. We look at real estate listings.
- On the way back to the hotel, we stop off at a Brooklyn Heights falafel place we’d seen earlier, plus grab some wine at a WINE STORE, having learned our lesson.
- Gus CANNOT go to sleep. It’s 10pm and I’m walking him through the hotel ballrooms as several dozen Air Malaysia flight attendants check in

Day Five

- We repeat the first part of yesterday, spending time at Brooklyn Bridge Park, Fulton Park, and getting bagels and coffee
- Gus runs around the hotel room for an hour or two while I pack and Brian runs out for back-up diapers
- We take the train to Queens and just miss the Q33. Ten minutes later, we’re on the bus again and it’s inching through weekend crowds. We turn a corner and run smack into some Columbian Day Parade
- WIth 45 minutes until our flight, we get to LaGuardia and find out that our flight has been delayed for an hour. After we get on the plane, we’re stuck on the tarmac for an hour and a half.
- Gus is pissed.
- We land, finally, and thus begins our train-to-bus trek home.